27/12/2015: Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, they did. Is anything going to go right for me anymore? This has been the WORST Christmas of my entire life. Nonetheless Christmas had to go on, and I am thankful it is over now. The only thing I am left with is the stomach bug that I came down with on Christmas night which was the absolute worst part of the last two weeks of being sick. :( I was so stupid to think that I could get through this Christmas ok, I really thought I would be able to laugh and half enjoy it. Not one moment of this holiday season has been ok. And I hesitated about writing here today because I wasn't sure if this was the place to get so negative. But I figured I might as well, this is a part of my life that I cannot change. You see my Dad passed away last month, on November 18th. It was the most traumatic night of my life, and something I never dreamed would ever happen. It just happened so suddenly, and within ten hours he was gone. Ever since then I have been on a downward spiral of emotions and anxiety. I have been sick now since December 13th and have yet to get better because my body is just so run down from all the stress. This stomach bug was really just the icing on the cake. I am absolutely terrified of throwing up and up until yesterday I hadn't thrown up since I was 12 years old. :( I have a disorder called emetophobia which is an irrational fear of vomiting, but more about that another day. It really has been a horrible Christmas. And I miss my Dad so much..... He and my Mom have been the only ones in my life who can truly understand my anxiety and panic disorder. If I didn't have my Mom I would literally perish.

My Tamas had to be paused for the better part of yesterday because I was just so sick, and I am still really not well today either.  I cannot eat anything for fear that I will just throw it up. While I was sleeping yesterday my RedGreen Tama changed into Takotchi - I was once again one discipline short of a Hashizotchi.

Today I just feel really numb. I haven't been able to move around a whole lot. It is amazing what stress and anxiety can do to your immune system. I know I sound like a spoiled brat the way I am complaining, but I just never in my wildest dreams thought I would loose my Dad the way I did. I had only been talking to him just a few minutes before he took the heart attack in his sleep. I love my parents so much, so this is a huge loss.

Anyways, I am not going to write much more now.  I just wanted to get this blog over with because there really was nothing good to say. Mimitchi just got sick at age 13 - that is his first sickness, which usually happens at age 11, but I did pause him a bit. My Angel is still Kuriten and doing quite well. Zukitchi on my white/green/red Tama is 75% disciplined and doing just fine. And Metal GreyMon Digi is 21 years old and not one bit demanding. I am really amazed at Digi! He is a real trooper of a Tama!

I will end this blog here now. I hope that the next time I write here I will have something good to talk about. I am glad that I finally talked about my Dad.

UpDate: Well I have been so out of it that I forgot to upload this, but I have had a couple of changes happen. Christmas miracles really do happen, because Zukitchi changed into Zatchi this afternoon while we were watching the TV series, Suits on Netflix. I am amazed to be quite honest as I never even caught his last discipline before he got sick. I do love little Zatchi and that made the day a bit better. :) I also caved and hatched my Japanese Angelgotch, bringing me up to six Tamas again. I am really excited to compare the differences between the Japanese and American Angels. More to come about that very soon! I am going to upload this blog even though it is horribly depressing and head off to watch some more TV with my little ones.

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